How to Lose Weight With No Gym #transformationtuesday

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Hi guys!

In honor of #TransformationTuesday, I thought I’d share my top tips and tricks to lose weight fast… safely, with no gym!

As many of you are aware, I have two kids which means I’ve had two pregnancies–and I gained a lot of weight despite my staying active. Both times I was pregnant, I gained over 50 pounds. I stretched, stretched, and yep…stretched some more…everywhere!

 

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I had already lost all my baby weight before I joined a gym after having baby #2, my daughter, Ariel this year. I joined because I was training for my first bikini competition, and I wanted the structure of having daycare while I worked out since I had committed to being on stage in a tiny bikini.

But I assure you, you do not need a gym membership to get fit and healthy. You can lose weight safely and swiftly, tone, and transform in the comfort of your own home. (OR gym if that’s where you prefer! 🙂 )

 

 

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Below are my top tips on how you can lose weight with or without a gym membership:

  1. Drink more water. Ditch all drinks that add in calories–that means saying “no” to juice, soda, and electrolyte drinks with unnecessary calories and sugar. Those calories add up and convert into fat!
  2. Use at least one meal replacement a day. You don’t need to completely change your eating in the beginning to lose weight. Try supplementing one meal a day with a healthy, nutritious and convenient shake–you can lose up to one pound a week doing that alone. You can get yours here–all my combos come with a full meal plan!
  3. Get active without over-complicating it. Aim to move your body every day for at least 10 minutes. That could mean going on a walk or jog during your lunch break. Or that can mean taking the kids for an afternoon stroll. If you want a good sweat, try a YouTube video–there are thousands of free routines to get your heart pumping.
  4. Add weights into your routine. If you really want to transform your body (and not just lose weight), you need to add some resistance into your routine. Don’t worry–you won’t get too muscular–our bodies do not produce enough hormone to become too masculine as women. Instead, you’ll add weight in all the right places!
  5. Keep it simple. Ditch fast foods. Eat plenty of proteins (eggs, fish, lean meats), whole grains, fruits and veggies. Your skin will glow, muscle will grow, and fat will dissipate.

Be patient and love yourself NOW! Don’t wait until you lose weight to feel good about yourself, or you will sabotage your efforts. How do you begin the self-love journey? By making better decisions…today.

For coaching, contact me at momswearheels@gmail.com. I’m currently offering supplements, meal plans, workout programs, and skype coaching. I can’t wait to make some breakthroughs with you!

Thanks for stopping by my site!

 

Be blessed, be well, be healthy,

 

Monica Bencomo

 

Why I’m Choosing to Homeschool

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As some of you have already read on my Instagram, I’ve chosen to remove Eliel from his school and homeschool him along with his little sister. I was pleasantly surprised to see that quite a few of you in the Moms Wear Heels community have 1) Been homeschooled yourself, 2) Are an advocate of homeschooling or 3) Are on the fence as to whether or not it would be a good option for your own family.

While I’m no parenting expert, I can vouch for what works and feels right for my family.  Like in all areas of life, I feel using our Intuition is the most valuable thing we can do concerning figuring out what is best for our children.

 

I can answer my biggest reason why I’ve come to this conclusion with a brief story:

 

I was in the eighth grade in Illinois at Webster Middle School. I was highly skilled at convincing my principal, Mr. Head, to give my friends and I passes (or as I like to refer to them, Get Out of Jail Free Cards)  to escape the prison of my classroom to go rehearse for an upcoming school talent show. All I wanted to do was dance, sing, and perform. While all the other kids in my neighborhood watched TV, I taught myself new dance sequences by recording and watching the latest music videos on The Box over and over until the VHS tape wore down. I was smart–an avid reader, a straight A student, but I couldn’t deny the fact that I felt most alive while being on stage. Thankfully, I had a principal who believed in me and my persistence enough to bend the rules on my behalf and even told me, “Hey, you better give me a shout out on the Soul Train awards when you make it!” His statement conveyed his belief in my talent; a moment I have never forgotten as an adult.

 

 

Me in middle school and Mr. Head!

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And while my “stage” is not the Soul Train awards, I do feel compelled to share my journey on this platform and community which I consider very well my stage, my blog and social media.

Now I’m no Beyonce (although sometimes my lip syncing may have you thinking differently), I feel the experience I had in the performing arts as a child, teenager, and young adult has served me quite well as an adult. Whether I’m auditioning for a show, giving a speech on motherhood, or choreographing a dance for an upcoming performance, I know my past helped shape me into the woman I am today.

When I experienced a depression in high school and I began to rebel in unhealthy ways, I now understand retrospectively that I simply needed to tend to my creative spirit to vent out my frustrations. I had stopped dancing, writing, and performing in an effort to “fit in” to a culture that felt innately foreign to me, and as a result, allowed that stagnation of energy to turn into self-pity. Really–what an act of self-betrayal it is to cut yourself off from the one thing that truly makes you light up inside? For a while, I did take a city bus miles in the snow at age 16 to a nearby Suburb to put myself through dance classes, but gave up due to money and lack of motivation to continue. It was hard. And my mom convinced me otherwise: “Don’t waste money on that!!” my mom would say. “Teach yo’self how to dance, chile!”

I feel the best we can do as parents is to actively retrospect and take what worked in our childhood, what we’ve learned, and apply the corrections as needed to our own family.

And… a Disclaimer: The intention of this post is not to bash the school system–like most things–there are both pros and cons to  homeschooling and our educational institutions. I do foresee my kids attending school in the future, when I have time the time and desire to research and find one that feels best and suits their unique needs!

But below are some of the main reasons I have chosen to homeschool my kids (at least for now). I still have a lot more to learn on the subject, but am confident with my decision to date.

 

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Why I’m Homeschooling My Kids

  1. I believe as a culture, we are being over-diagnosed with labels like ADHD. Are there reeeaaally 6.4 million kids with this disorder, or are we simply refusing to accommodate a very diverse population of children? Not all kids have the same learning style. Some need more movement and interaction; others a more tranquil environment to flourish.  Our average institution, unfortunately, does not acknowledge this fact.
  2. Kids grow up…really fast. I don’t want to miss out on all the awesome moments as a parent if I don’t have to yet. Observing my son learn, grow, stretch, and transform every day is a journey I truly enjoy as a mother. And before I know it, he’ll be wanting his space from his overbearing mom, but for now, he loves being close to his mom aka maestra!
  3. Teaching my son at home will be invaluable for his younger sister. Not only am I teaching Eliel counting, shapes, sentence construction, and so on, but Ariel is getting in on all the fun!
  4. I want my kids to be bilingual. I’m teaching them mainly in Spanish. My goal is for them to be fluent. This is a huge advantage nowadays.
  5. My goal as a mom is to find out what my kid’s unique gifts are and nurture them as much as possible. When I was three, I was obsessed with dance. I vividly remember standing on on my tippy toes while peering down at a book on ballet at three years old, determined to teach myself since my mom couldn’t afford dance classes for me. I want my kids to be able to pursue their passions on a daily basis. Who knows what their unique destiny is? My job is to help them find their own path in life, not conforming to the expectations of who our society tells them they should be.
  6. And about who society tells us to be… I want my kids to be able to express who they truly are with their wardrobe, hairstyles, mannerisms, etc. I can’t tell you how many times I got called to the principal’s office because I broke the “white, khaki, or navy blue” code inadvertently. This made me feel as though I was a “bad” kid, when intuitively I knew I just wanted to be expressive and creative.

 

I could go on and on about homeschooling, creativity, non-conformity, and motherhood, but for the sake of wrapping up this blog, I’ll end by sharing a Ted Talk on the subject I really enjoyed. I think you may too.

 

 

I’m Coming Out | My Personal Evolution

I wondered for a few days whether or not I’d post this  blog, but then quickly decided I had to face my fear by remembering some of my personal values:

  1. Authenticity
  2. Courage
  3. Connection
  4. Beauty (completely relative, I know)

Whenever I’m having a hard time figuring out the next best move, I find that revisiting my values helps me know the next best thing to do.

So, here it goes… 🙂

I’m finding it harder and harder to go on social media sites. What I’m finding is that many of us are giving up our personal values in exchange for a quick buck, a “like”, or another view.

Basically, I think we are losing our authenticity in exchange for popularity.

I’m a rebel at heart. So I am not good at following the herd. Never have been; never will be. So–I’ve decided to consciously quit that rat race in order to maintain peace, happiness, and integrity.

Many of you know I competed in my first bikini competition recently while still breastfeeding my 11 month old. That journey was ANYTHING but easy, but I learned a lot about myself as a woman, goddess, business woman and mother that I find invaluable.

What I found was that my heart, soul, and inner guidance system was guiding me in another direction. For many months, I’ve grown my social media following by posting fitness posts like these. 

I think that’s awesome! Millions of us are struggling with weight, and I am honored to help inspire others to become healthy and happy.

HOWEVER.

My “coming out” is about the harsh fact and realization that there are hundreds of thousands of fitness personalities out there who can help you learn how to squat using perfect form, can provide you with a meal plan, and scoot you on your merry way.

But that’s not my passion anymore. And quite frankly, we don’t need more fitness professionals focusing solely on looks in an already over-saturated market. It’s not helping others create lasting change. It’s only feeding an ego-driven culture.

My true passion is coaching women on how to transform their lives (not just their physiques)–inspiring women to become their most authentic, healthy, happy selves from the inside out; not reverse. I light up from within when I hear a client say, “You just gave me the chills!” or “You just lit a fire in my belly” or “Amen!!” I live for my clients’ ah-ha moments–I understand that THAT is where true, lasting change happens.

We are constantly being inundated with new fitness programs–the new fad diet. I constantly am flooded with offers on the next diet fad to promote in my DM for a quick few hundred dollars. I say “no” a lot to these offers because I refuse to compromise my integrity for a quick buck. If I’m not using the product, I’m not going to recommend it to you guys.

My “I’m Coming Out” video is all about following our intuition to become our best selves. Having the courage to follow our own unique life path in a world where twerking and booty shots are what’s in.

I am going to continue my journey as a fitness coach with this premise: I only wish to work with clients whom are ready to transform into the woman they’ve always dreamed of becoming. Will that include tools for your fitness transformation? Yes! Health and wellness is an essential part of being well.

But.

If we work together, we will be getting to the root cause of why you have not conquered your fitness goals yet. In other words, what are the key sabotaging factors that are preventing you from becoming the woman or man of your dreams? What I’ve found to be common is ADDICTIONS. Addictions to food, comfort, drugs, or the current version of yourself can self sabotage even the best workout and meal plan.

I am excited for this new journey, because I know it is MINE. I am not interested in swimming in anyone else’s lane. I want to continue to have the courage to live my own destiny in order to truly serve the world with my gifts.

So what can you expect to come? More workouts that combine mind, body and spirit like yoga, plyo, calisthenics, and much more. Posts on motherhood, relationships, common struggles regarding marriage (and how to overcome them) and some dance videos too! (I am a dancer at heart; always have been always will be).

My goal is to defy all categories and boxes placed on me. I can continue to transform as a mother, wife, and business woman. And I refuse to stifle my creativity in order to fit in.

My hope in the near future is that we have more transparent, authentic faces on social media. Some of THE most inspiring people I know are the REALEST. People like Glennon Doyle Melton, 2 Pac, Brene Brown, Oprah, Elizabeth Gilbert, Eliott Hulse and many many more… I respect those who have the courage to be transparent. These are the people who help me through challenging chapters of my life. They provide a sense of community that reminds you that you are not alone. And I hope I can continue to do that for you guys!

Thank you for stopping by my site today. Be blessed. Be you. Be healthy! And don’t let anyone steer you away from your authenticity.

Love,

 

Monica Bencomo

 

 

My Weight Loss Transformation Story (Oxygen Magazine)

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Happy #transformationtuesday! Today I’m reflecting on my weight loss journey to date before I set my next weight loss goals.

I cannot ONLY share my postpartum fitness journey/transformation with you all. I would be remiss if I left out my first, most challenging weight loss transformation of all. The transformation that started when I was about 19 year old.

I remember the day I made the decision that enough was enough. I simply was sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I was eating crap everyday, not moving my body as the athlete I used to know myself to be, and felt like I was living a (horrible) alter ego’s life. I knew God had much better plans for me.

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Deep down, I knew I had to change. And I was ready. I am dramatic–so it was not enough to simply start exercising in the neighborhood I was living in in Illinois and start fresh. I instinctively knew I needed to relocate to find myself…away from the drama, toxicity and trouble.

I started off simple–I cut all fast foods out of my diet, increased my water and protein intake, and hit the ground running, literally. I knew my first steps in my journey was to develop discipline and shed some fat, so I kept things simple by jogging 3-5 days a week rain, sleet or snow before school and work.

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Before I knew it, my pants weren’t fitting anymore–they were baggy. My skin was clearing up. I had more energy than ever before. And was starting to gain confidence.

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Now–disclaimer: I am not saying you need to be thin to feel good about yourself, but I AM saying you need to feel good about who you are, what you do and how you do it to be truly comfortable in your own skin.

Now after two pregnancies, a bikini competition less than a year post baby #2, and much more, I am still on my journey of becoming healthier and happier. I don’t think we have ever “arrived”. Life is a journey and I look forward to where the future will guide me to go.

Full story on Oxygen can be found here!

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So here’s my question for you: when did you know or sense it was time for you to make a change?

I’d love to know in the comments below!

Love always,

Monica Bencomo

What I Know For Sure at 30

Last day as a 29 year old!
Last day as a 29 year old!

 

Wow.

Tomorrow I’ll be 30 years old. 30 is one of those milestone birthdays in that it will make you feel like an adult…or if you’re like me, make you feel like you should be more “adult”.

Many hit a depression and start to question their lives around their 30th birthday.  Scramble to solidify a career, meet a guy, shack up, and have kids. Not me. I do everything a**-backwards. I’ve been married since eloping at 21, a business owner since 24, and am already a mama of 2 beautiful babes.

So, my quarter life crisis feels uniquely different than many others may. By the looks of things I’m supposed to already have life figured it out. Society tells us by the time we’re wives and mothers we should know what the hell we’re doing. As if creating life and putting on a ring gives us an automatic download to all things needed to run our lives perfectly. Pff. I know better.

I know we’re all on our own journey. I know that even the most seemingly put together person carries with them their own set of insecurities, doubts, and regrets.

I used to think I was alone in that fact. Thank God I can find solace in the understanding above. The wisest people I’ve encountered admit to not know the answers to life after all.

Yet–despite all of this–there are some nuggets of wisdom I’ve gained on my journey to date. While I’m humble enough to admit I am faaaaaarrrrrr from any idea of perfection, I’m also confident enough to say that I AM sure about some things… Below is that list. Enjoy.

 

What I know for sure at 30

 

  1. A clarification of values can save you a lot of time with indecision. Know what you stand for so your “yes” can be one with authenticity and your “no” can be firm.
  2. About authenticity–it is one of my most cherished values. I believe owning who you are–who you were born to be–is one of the most charming, attractive things anyone can do. And sexy.
  3. If you don’t create boundaries, others won’t know when to stop crossing the line. With two kids, two businesses, and a husband, my time is one of my most guarded treasures.
  4. You can’t please the whole crowd. Nor should you want to.
  5. Your intuition is one of your biggest assets. Use when making EVERY decision.
  6. Seek to be respected. Not liked.
  7. Be more present. When you take time to slow down, you notice the miraculous nature of LIFE.
  8. Nurture your most cherished relationships. Those connections are priceless.
  9. Have even more fun. Act like a kid. You’ll live longer, stress less, and smile more.
  10. Don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re bold and unapologetic. You’re going to make mistakes. That’s alright. Get back up.
  11. Truly accepting yourself is one of the bravest things you’ll ever have to do.
  12. Let go of draining, toxic relationships. Your time spent on that could be used towards your beautiful babies. You can’t fix them. Focus on you.
  13. Follow your bliss. Not every passion needs to be monetized.
  14. You will be “too much” for some. But don’t dull that light, that personality, that fierceness. It will be the key to your success.
  15. Stop worrying so much. It won’t change anything.
  16. My current heroes–Maya Angelou, Oprah, Elizabeth Gilbert, Brene Brown, Michelle Obama…to name a few.
  17. You like your time alone. Don’t feel like you have to always be extroverted to have fun. Do what makes your soul happy. Not what some magazine tells you will make you happy.
  18. Turning 30? This is  just the beginning. God has amazing doors getting ready to open that leads you to the next phases in your Destiny.

 

Now tell me…what is it you knew for sure at 30? What would you go back and tell your younger self?

 

I’d love to know in the comments below.

 

And always, thanks for sharing and liking!

 

Happy Birthday to me!!!

 

Love y’all,

 

Monica B.

 

 

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Toned up Tuesdays: Inner Thigh Workout (video)

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Inner thighs are a problem area for many of us women, mainly since we don’t consciously try to work them often. The video below displays some of my favorite inner thigh workouts. I’ve been working out at home and have not stepped foot in a gym since training for my bikini competition and prefer it this way this season in my life.

 

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I love being home and watching all the milestones with my babies!! I try to incorporate them into my workouts as often as possible.

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Try this workout and share it with a friend!

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Eliel’s 4th Birthday | Mommy Monday

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Turns out, all the parent cliches are true: time really does fly by when you’re having fun.

My little boy is already 4! I wanted his birthday to feel extra special. As a mom of 2, I’m constantly worried that I’m giving one child more attention than the other and am always overcompensating for this insecurity (just being honest). I love both my kids so much and really wanted to create a memorable day for their birthdays. Below is his birthday vlog. Thanks for watching and subscribing.

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Fitness

Of course, I’d be remiss if we didn’t discuss another one of my favorite topics–fitness! As a mom of 2, it can be very challenging to find time to workout. I’ll be sharing my top tips on how you can snatch your sexy (and your healthy) back…even as a busy mom!