Getting the Family Ready for Halloween!

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Happy Monday!

 

I don’t know about you, but I am getting excited for Halloween already! I’ve already decorated the house with my son, Eliel, painted pumpkins, and now all that’s left–we have to create our costumes!

I mention what our family-themed costume is going to be–don’t steal it! ;)

 

Let me know what your family has planned this Halloween in the comments below!

 

 

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Make Time for YOU Mom and Dad!

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Happy Monday!

 

Today on Parenting 411, we discussed the importance of mom and dad making time for themselves as individuals.

 

I know I am a much better mommy to my son when I have taken time to feed my soul, and connect with my inner guidance (which is something I tend to do in the morning over coffee).

 

Watch today’s segment and let me know how you take time for you in the comments below :)

 

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Simple Ways to Develop Healthy Habits for the Family

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Happy Monday!

Here is today’s episode of Parenting 411 where I illustrate my top tips to pass along healthy eating habits for your family!

 

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The Childfree Life: When Having it all Means Having No Children

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Casually scrolling through my Instagram feed today, I noticed a Time’s magazine article off of one of my fit mom follower’s pages, Mrs. Maria Kang. The Times article is entitled: The Childfree Life: When Having it All Means Having No Children.

 

Immediately curious, I scoured the internet until I could find and read the article.  The author discusses how there is a new sub-generation evolving from Generation X: and that is the generation that simply put does not feel a strong desire to have children.

 

Now, while I am a firm believer of the “different strokes for different folks” idea, I’ve gotta admit: I was a bit perplexed. While I do understand the freedom of responsibility (and not to mention stretch-mark less body and more money) that accompanies not having kids, I also have experienced the other side of the coin: becoming a mommy. Giving birth was the best day of my life, so forgive me if I am little biased towards dissecting this article (I promise I am more unbiased than you think).

 

Now, while I can understand while some are choosing to not procreate, I considered it a valid question to ask: well, why not?

 

According to the author of  The Childfree Life: When Having it All Means Having No Children, many women of today’s generation feel more empowered than in any other time in history. The daughters of the baby boom and bra-burning era, the women of Generation X are choosing career priorities over the priorities associated with motherhood. Another reason for the decline in birth in the US is that women are weighing their options, and feel more sexy, free, and in control than their non-mom counterparts.

 

Hmmmm, I thought. To risk being a bit transparent, I will admit to recently toying around with the idea of having baby number 2. I’ve been weighing my own options: Pro–Eliel will have a sibling close in age. Con–I barely have enough time as it is. Pro–I loved being preggo! Con: Yeah, but you got fat. Pro–It’d be awesome to see my kiddos grow up close in age! Con–But what about your dreams, woman!?

 

Overall, I can totally see why some couples and women would choose to forgo their urge to have children. Hey–the childfree couple will go on more vacations, have more sex, and most likely have a lot more money and free time to spend it all.

 

But I, ladies and gentlemen, am a hopeless romantic. When I’m in love, I think kids. Being in love (and married) for me is synonymous with baby making time! (Bow-chicka-bow-bowrrw!)

 

However, I still have many things my “selfish” self wishes to accomplish prior to adding more kiddos to the mix. And perhaps waiting or letting go of the idea of having 1 kid or more kids is the least selfish thing anyone can do. There is no need to consciously bring more beautiful souls into this world if we do not have the time, resources, and love they will deserve. Can I get an amen?!

 

So, folks, the decision we will all have to make concerning whether or not we wish to remain childfree or have children is a very personal decision. If you have the time, dinero, and love (and a stable partner, I hope!), then go for it if your heart desires it! However, if you are ambivalent about having kiddos, it may be wise to practice birth control until clarity arises.

 

That’s my take on it, what do you think about the new childfree generation? Progressive or nah?

 

Let me know in the comments below!

 

Monica Bencomo

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My Theory on Why I Miscarried (Ectopic Pregnancy)

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Greetings!

 

I was inspired to write this blog today due to my own personal “ah-ha” moments I’ve been having lately concerning my ectopic pregnancy that happened this past Mother’s Day. Like most things in life, we will not have clarity on situations until we look back, or in other words, we don’t know why things happened to us (especially the unpleasant things) until we glance back retrospectively.

 

To clarify, my husband and I were open to having more kids when we became pregnant with baby number 2. We love being parents, and thought “If it happens, it happens”–becoming pregnant again anyway. Well, it happened. One sunny Sunday morning, I woke up to a positive dollar store pregnancy test. I took one only to “rule out the possibility of being pregnant” not because I actually thought I was, but rather due to my concern for my late period.

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Anyway, I was pleasantly surprised and excited to learn we were expecting. I have always wanted to have 2-3 kids, and hey–why not have them closer in age? (Definitely harder for the parents, but I think beautiful to observe at the same time).

 

Long story short, I suffered an ectopic pregnancy, fainting at a local video store. (Full story on my miscarriage here.) I knew, just instinctively knew while writhing on the floor in pain that all this must be happening for a reason.

 

Just as when my son, Eliel, was born, I felt the presence of God in the room while suffering from my miscarriage. His presence assured me that I was not suffering in vain, that He had a higher plan.

 

Knowing this, I still was a bit depressed after having miscarried. It wasn’t an average miscarriage–mine resulted in horrific abdominal pain that resulted in my needing to have surgery to remove one of my fallopian tubes. I was on bed rest for 1.5 weeks. I couldn’t exercise. I couldn’t even lift my son. I was sad. I was angry that this had interrupted my life and that God wasn’t giving me the answers then and there as to why it all was happening. I prayed and prayed and prayed: Why? What do you want me to learn from this? Silence.

 

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In retrospect, I realize that while God’s presence was silent, He was also very comforting. I didn’t feel alone, although I was. My husband still had to work 14 hour days, and my son was in the care of his grandparents.

 

Fast-forward all this to today. My body has healed from my surgery, but more importantly, my spirit and soul have as well. I have a new sense of love and appreciation for my son, my husband, and my life. I believe that I lost our second baby because God wanted to ensure Elvis and I were strong. While I marriage was okay, I realize we didn’t connect enough or talk about the important things nearly enough. But most importantly, we needed to have God 1st in our lives. Period. Now, He is.

 

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Not many people are aware of this, but Elvis and I “took a break” from each other emotionally to figure out what we really needed and wanted for a couple months. During this break, we spent a lot of time apart. We were still business partners, but thoroughly focused on our own selves and our son rather than each other. And I gotta tell ya, we both were much less happy in this scenario. We realized during this break that we are a true power couple: we are much stronger together than separate. Also, Eliel, our son, is much happier when Mom and Dad are in love.

 

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So, all in all, I now see that my daughter (I sense she was a girl), knew that then was not the best time to come meet Mom and Dad in person. God, knowing how much of a dramatic person I am, decided to offer me a wake up call to my marriage and divine purpose by allowing me to suffer a miscarriage on Mother’s Day–ironic, I know. But I now have peace with what happened because I sense God is smiling at the recent choices my husband and I have been making. We are living our divine purpose, together. We are stronger than ever. And our son is going to reap all the benefits of seeing a healthy, happy marriage.

 

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I will close this blog with this question: Is there something that happened to you in your past that you considered “bad” that you now see was a blessing in disguise? Let me know in the comments below.

 

And to my daughter, I know you are still coming, but when the time is right. :)

Blessings and Peace to you all,

Thank you for reading,

Monica Bencomo

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Potty Training Tips

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Hola!

Now, many of you may know that my son, Eliel, will be two this November. So aside from the temper tantrums that tend to accompany this age, we also have been starting our potty training!

 

I do not believe that we should rush or compare our children to others who have potty trained in a shorter or longer period of time. That is what takes the fun out of the process of watching your child grow!

 

Watch my latest segment of Parenting 411 where I give away my top tips on potty training and let me know in the comments below if I have missed anything!

 

 

 

Check out a home video of our Potty Training Hour:

 

 

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How to Lose 5 lbs (water weight) in 1 Week

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Hey guys!   Now, I first want to explain why I have only been blogging once a week. Right now, I’m in school full time, working at my restaurant Pasion Latin Fusion, Kasa Fox, training for my fitness competition, and of course, caring for mi amor, Eliel.

 

On top of that, I just got back from traveling in Chicago. Unfortunately, I let my cravings get the best of me, and due to stress and lack of discipline, I gained 7 lbs during the 4 days I was out there! (I don’t even want to TELL you what I ate). I’m too ashamed.

 

My Baby on a Plane! planee   plane

 

So, now I’m back, and I’m feeling FLUFFY. HEAVY. BLOATED. UGH. I thought I would share my plan to slim down–in a healthy way–and get back on track.

 

Here’s my plan to lose the water weight (and additional pounds gained) in a week healthily:

 

1) Drink a GALLON of water a day This flushes out all of the toxins out of your body, naturally aiding in healthy digestion. Icing on the cake? Glowing skin :)

 

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2) Eat tons of green leafy vegetables Want to know the “trick” to losing weight? Going number 2! (Yup!) Greens help push all the elimination out of your body–it almost acts as a natural colonic. And again–

contributes to oh-so-glowy skin ;)

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3) Drink teas and eliminate alcohol I had some delicious red wines while out in Chi-Town, but now that I’m back on “training” or “healthy” mode, my house is stocked with teas, not vino. I like Yogi teas, but any tea–especially GREEN, will aid in your weight loss goals. Green tea aids in fat loss and is PACKED with antioxidants. :)

 

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4) Still get your protein Now you guys know, muscle burns fat (which is why I’m always lifting weights). So it is important to keep and build your existing muscles. Protein is a key component to assist you in doing so.  Try tuna, salmon, lean chicken and turkey, and protein powder.

 

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Overall, these are my top tips for any healthy detox.  To get all the crap out of your body–you must eat mindfully and use these 4 tips.  Stay away from all processed foods, and eat more of what is grown from the earth.

 

Be sure to ‘like’ my FB Moms Wear Heels page, and follow me on Instagram to see my transformation!

 

Have any questions? Don’t hesitate, lemme know in the comments below.   We can do this guys!  Whooo!

 

 

Monica Bencomo

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How to be a More Conscious Parent

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Happy Monday!

 

Ahh… I love Mondays.  For me, they represent a new beginning–an opportunity to become an even better version of myself.  And for today’s episode of Parenting 411, I wanted to focus on becoming an even better, or more conscious parent. Check out the video below and discover simple ways to become a more conscious parent yourself!

 

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Tech Toys I Recommend for Your Kiddos!

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Happy Monday!

OK, y’all, I am headed to Chicago tomorrow first thing in the morning with my toddler, Eliel, alone. So to my delight, I needed to pick up some tech toys for today’s segment on Parenting 411 which I think will serve my son well while flying! Are there any toys your child must have? If so, what are they, and do you put any time limits on how long they can play with them? Let me know in the comments below!

 

Monica Bencomo

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How To Have Fun this Labor Day with your Kids

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Happy Labor Day!

 

Now, if you’re a parent, you may be wondering how you can enjoy yourself this Labor Day with your children.  I definitely plan on enjoying the holiday with my son, so here are my top tips on how to have a good time while being on mommy–or daddy–duty.  Thanks for watching!

 

 

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